Tepat di hari minggu


Minggu, sangat tidak biasa hari ini, saya bisa merasakannya sebagai hari libur. Tak seperti lalu, senin, rabu, kamis, sabtu semua berlabel sama : rutinitas harian. Bekerja atau melawan hidup.
Pagi hari terbangun dengan perasaan yang lega, setelah dua malam setia di depan monitor dan berkutat dengan narasi narasi perjalanan kerja. Untunglah, halaman demi halaman selesai tepat di hari minggu. Tubuh seolah membalaskan dendamnya, tak lagi ingin berkompromi, tak mau lagi terkoneksi dengan perintah otak, yang dinginkan hanyalah berbaring dan menghirup debu debu kamar.
Lalu kemudian hujan datang, bersenandung dan membuat libur ini begitu lelap.
Untuk semua yang menginginkan saya saat ini, tunggu saja esok hari.


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Dulu, saya begitu membenci keegoisan dan amarahmu.
Tapi malam itu, saya begitu menikmatinya sayang.

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"Don't exist. Live. Get out, explore. Thrive. Challenge authority. Challenge yourself. Evolve. Change forever. It's time to be aggressive. You've started to speak your mind, now keep going with it, but not with the intention of sparking controversy or picking a germane fight. Get your gloves on, it's time for rebirth. There IS no room for the nice guys in the history books. THIS IS THE START OF A REVOLUTION. THE REVOLUTION IS YOUR LIFE. THE GOAL IS IMMORTALITY. LET'S LIVE, BABY. LET'S FEEL ALIVE AT ALL TIMES. TAKE NO PRISONERS. HOLD NO SOUL UNACCOUNTABLE, ESPECIALLY NOT YOUR OWN. IF SOMETHING DOESN'T HAPPEN, IT'S YOUR FAULT. Make this moment your reckoning. Your head has been held under water for too long and now it is time to rise up and take your first true breath. Do everything with exact calculation, nothing without meaning. Do not make careful your words, but make no excuses for what you say. Fuck em' all. Set a goal for everyday and never be tired." — Brian Krans (A Constant Suicide)

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